Straight Up

So I've been in LA for a week now and I'm getting much more used to it then I have in the past. I've been hanging out mostly is Silverlake which is a little mellower and more my scene. I'm staying in Hollywood though and every night I leave to go out I have to walk through a sea of paparazzi to get to my car. It's a weird deal for trailer trash like myself but I'm having a blast.

I'm not sure about the dudes down here though. I would describe them as "pussies" but maybe that's a little unfair. I guess the correct term would be metrosexual. I can't believe girls are into that shit, but I'm a dude so I'm not really sure. Can you ladies let me know the acceptable amount of hair products, prep time and overall fashion sense allowable? Sometimes women need to tell you stuff so you don't end up going over board. A long time ago a girl told me that women hate it when you look up at them while you're eating them out. Since then I've heard the same thing from tons of chicks. I would have never known had someone not told me and I bet there are a bunch of dudes right now staring at their girlfriends while they eat their pussies. Stop it. Apparently they hate that.

This week I was also reminded of another relationship issue. Here's the deal.

Say you have a boyfriend who spends a lot of time with another girl he considers to be one of his best friends. Cool right? Well say that this girl hates you and you hate her. Basically she's like your arch nemesis. Also at some point in the past your boyfriend has slept with this girl. What do you do?

My action would be to lay down an ultimatum. You can either stay in this relationship and not be friends with this person or we're done. I know it seems kinda harsh, but I think it's just matter of respect. If a girlfriend of mine really didn't like one person and everytime I hung out with that person she talked shit about my girlfriend I would have to stop being friends with her.

I know you ladies love to be mistreated but honestly how would you deal with this type of situation?