Straight Up

Couple things first. We only have about a week left to decide who the female blogger will be so keep up the good work and keep writing. The responses and ideas have all been really cool so far. Plus it totally makes me so hot when you tell me what a pig I am.

Also well be changing the name of the column once we hire somebody to fill the spot. Im not asking for submissions but its just a little heads up so you get confused and say hmm where did that Jed dude go with his column about Paula Abdul.

My last column got an interesting response from Sparkleplenty about her boyfriend wearing a hair piece and not telling her about it. It was totally off topic but it was so funny that I responded too it anyway. You can scroll down to last weeks post and read it. Real quick have you ever dated a guy that wore a hairpiece. I can’t imagine actually being able to pull that off without telling your partner. I mean it took Jennifer Anniston a few years to find out about Brad’s tiny vagina that he cleans with a q-tip but she still found out.

That leads to this weeks topic. Its more of a question then anything else because honestly I don’t know the answer.

Is it ever ok to lie to someone that youre in a committed relationship with. I go back and forth on this all the time. Sometimes I think that if you get drunk and cheat on your girlfriend (not that I ever have) but you know in your heart that you won’t do it again then whats the point in telling her. Can you live with the guilt. Obviously if youve never done anything worth lying about then its not a problem. But should you always fess up to cheating. Does the truth always come out. Should you tell your girlfriend you wear a Merkin for sanitary reasons. So many questions.

Lets discuss this one as a class.

Wow, I am good.

So I just got back from vacation with my folks. We went down to the Oregon coast which is where I have been going since I was a little baby. My mom made me climb a rock wall like I used to do when I was a teenager. I made it to the top on sheer pride but I could not breathe afterwards and my back hurt like shit. Hard livin has caught up to me at 25.

As an aside I dont think you can ever find hot chicks in small towns. You find a lot of families and gross white trash but I think all the hot chicks move as soon as they turn 18. My two cents hold onto the mailbag for just a sec.

Anyway after I got back I was shocked to see how many comments my columns got. Not only the amount of stuff but how interesting your take on things were. I would be reading one comment and think to myself Man Jed, you really are a sexist asshole you should call your Mom and then the next comment would be someone saying that they agree with me 100 percent. Just the to set the record straight I am a total asshole. I am not sexist though. I am just a guy who has dated an above average amount of women for his age and has way too many opinions. Also I am 100 percent right half the time.

But just so you know I dont really care if you agree with me or not. I think most of you guys have really great interesting things to say and the e mails I have gotten have been really cool. Plus its fun to be told what a jerk I am every now and again. I think they call that growth. So keep the dialogue going and in the next couple weeks Im going to be reading all of your blogs and deciding who will be the female counterpart.

Onto something else. Lets see how bout we talk about what assholes guys are. Well thats kinda boring cause we all know the deal. They say they are gonna call and they never do, they sleep with your friends they scream out their mothers name while they are rogering you from behind. Trust me I am getting somewhere here. I just want to share this story with you and then we can discuss.

One time I met a girl from Tucson or was it Phoenix. It doesnt really matter actually. Lets just say she was from New Mexico. Anyway so I take this girl home from the bar and we end up sleeping together. The sex part is unimportant to the story. I was 19 at the time and drunk. Draw your own conclusion. So anyway the next morning I get a phone call from my girlfriend who is out of town but on her way back in the next hour. I tell the New Mexican she needs to hurry up and leave because I have to go to work (I think it was a Sunday) of course she wants to hang out but I dont really have time for this. So I go in the bathroom to get myself together and I hear this little knock on the window. Chink I hear it again. I look out the window to see my neighbor (this girl that I would fool around with when we were both drunk and bored) and shes throwing rocks at the window. I do not know what she wants and I dont really care at this point so I just push the New Mexican girl out on the street and tell her to get lost. Mind you she has no idea what part of town shes in and I did not give her any money for a cab or any information on where she needs to go. Never saw her again.

So doesnt that sound like a real asshole move on my part? The problem with this story is that its all true except for the fact that in the real story I was the girl and New Mexican was me. She told me her boyfriend was on his way over and that he might kick my ass if I didnt leave! She also told me that the neighbor dude had a weird crush on her. I wonder if it was cause she got drunk and nailed him? I ended up having to walk like 5 miles back towards downtown Phoenix or Tucson in the blazing New Mexico sun. It was a real bummer. I felt really lame afterwards. I didnt care if she liked me but its a little weird to feel that unimportant.

Do girls ever think to themselves...at least I got laid.

Have you ever thrown someone out in the morning? Been thrown out?

Hi ladies and welcome to the first annual Friendsation blog competition. It's not actually a competition, but I am looking to hire someone to be my counterpart on the website.

Basically the deal is that you'll choose one topic from the 5 below and write about it in your blog. I will choose the person that I think best suits the website.

It's not important whether you agree with me when it comes to sex and dating, I'm looking for someone who is smart, funny and open-minded when it comes to sex and dating. Most importantly the ideal person is someone who is not afraid to be themselves and speak their mind.

Ok good luck and feel free to e mail me any questions you may have.

Love Jed.

1. I believe that all humans are naturally bisexual (except for dudes, that's gross) what is your take on hooking up with girls. Is it different then hooking up with guys?

2. Tell me when you think it's acceptable to have sex with someone who you consider to be just a friend. Does someone always have to get hurt?

3. Have you ever changed your personality or the way you look to attract a guy's attention? If so did it work?

4. When having a one night stand do you think guys should be expected to call if they ask for your number? Have you ever told a guy not to call you later?

5. What is the point of dating? Do you think it's smarter to date multiple people at once narrowing down the perfect mate or just wait til the right guy comes along?

How to Blog

1. Log in to Friendsation
2. On Member Menu - click on My Blog
3. My Blog - it will open in left hand window
4. My Blog - on right side under calendar click on edit my blog
5. New window - edit my blog will open new window
6. Write Blog - write your blog and you will be able to save or preview your post

We are still working on kinks in the system. Looking forward to reading your views on life, love and sex.

I have this theory that there are 3 types of girls when it comes to anal sex. The first type wants nothing to do with it. She is kinda boring, but probably pretty smart and ok to hang out with. Maybe she is a friend of your girlfriend or a lesbian but as long as she is not a bitch she is probably pretty cool. This is the type of woman that you want to be friends with. Reason being is that she probably has a lot of female friends. Girls are always attracted to these types of chicks as friends because they feel like they can tell them their problems and these girls won’t stab them in the back and take their boyfriends. Girls are always suspicious of their friends stealing their men and girls who are totally opposed to anal are probably not super hot.

Type 2 is totally into ass fucking and does not like to have sex with out you at least sticking your finger in her ass. She can usually have orgasms through penetration alone. She definitely has tattoos and maybe a racing flag above her ass. When you are done banging her she tells you to take a victory lap. That is your cue to fuck her in the ass. This actually happened to a friend of mine. Unless you are drunk it is probably best to stay away from these types of chicks. Sure they are fun to party with, but you would never be able to take her home to meet your folks and trust me if you started dating her she would turn out to be a fucking psycho. These chicks have fucked every dude in town, but that does not stop them from getting insanely jealous, especially in public. Stay away. Unless you are hammered. I mean “hey ya only live once.”

Then there is the third type. Basically this is your ideal mate anyway. She is smart and funny. Not overly sexual, but when you are alone she does not get embarrassed about stupid shit. Even if she has not had anal sex before it does not really matter. She likes you enough to trust that you will not hurt her. Plus even if she says she has not done it before, there is no point in believing her. She might have had the high school football team pull an intercontinental rectal train on her when she was sixteen. No big deal though. You are an adult right? Jealousy is stupid. So anyway after you guys talk about it and she agrees to do it then she is passed the test. It does not have to be great. That is not the point. The point is trust and honesty. As long as you both want it then everything should be fine. This is the type of girl that you should actually date.

Shoot me an e mail if you have any questions. Especially dudes. I am here to help.

Hey Jed,

What is your take on one night stands? I met this guy out one night with one of my girlfriends. He asked me out and we went out a few days later and had dinner. I had a few too many and spent the night at his house. I have not heard from him since. What gives?

Melissa

Hey Melissa,

Basically my take is that i think one night stands are fine as long as you protect yourself. Also if you can help it, try not to get too drunk. You may end up regretting it later.

What happened to you is so classic. I'm surprised girls haven't figured this one out yet. If you want a guy to call you, don't sleep with him on the first date. 99% of the time we won't call you back.

basically a woman's goal on a date was to find a boyfriend and a man's goal is too get laid. Girls always try to dispute this by saying that sometimes they just want to get laid too. So why do you get upset when we don't call?

Anyway the point is he accomplished his goal and moved on to the next. You should do the same. This time try a little harder though.

Jed

Hey dudes welcome to my first column/blog whatever you want to call it for Friendsation.com. Apparently this thing is called Straight Up with Jed which kinda makes me think about those health videos they would play for you in school because the teacher couldn't handle talking about sex with a bunch of 8th graders. All we really wanted to know was A. can you get pregnant from giving dudes blowjobs and B. How many beers can you put in your ass without getting alcohol poisoning? Btw I'll tell you the answers to these questions at the end here.

Anyway the point of this column is to provide you with some weekly entertainment while you're checking out the website. We'll talk about sex, relationships, how far is too far at family reunions, you know all that confusing stuff that young adults go through.

You can feel free to ask me anything you like and even if I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about it'll at least be funny to try and see what I come up with. It's like I said to this chick one time that only fucked Latin guys. "Just give me a shot and if it's really bad I'll take you out for tacos tomorrow."

I'm now really wishing I hadn't just told you that. Anyway since I did, I'll tell you that I'm guessing she still only fucks Latin guys.

Oh and before I forget hopefully we'll have a woman here shortly that will kind of act like my counterpart. We're thinking kind of like a female Dr. Drew, someone who knows a lot about the human body and can answer questions clinically in a way the average person could understand. Or even just some chick with big cans would be cool too.

So thanks for looking and hopefully you'll all be in touch soon.

P.S. the answers were 1 beer and yes if she spits into her vagina.