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Straight Up

06/12/06

The Pleasures of slutting it up

Filed under: Life — Hawkwind @ 02:23:07 am

I try really hard at pleasuring my girlfriend. Going down on her and
trying to make her feel good, but she doesn't seem to be able to get off. I
want to try anal sex but she says she's not into it. How do I get my
girlfriend to open up and be more sexual with me?

I can kind of see what is going on here. You might be getting frustrated
while she is giving up. The pressure builds. I know that a man just wants
his woman to get off. That's what he wants. Believe me, she wants it too. So,
when she doesn't get off, he feels like loser. You aren't a loser, you may
even be the greatest lover that ever existed, but aside from that, she just
might not feel comfortable with you and that is okay. Certain people match
with certain people for certain things. Sex is one, work is one, friends are another
one, there are tons of ways people can match up. Sexually maybe you two
aren't the best match. I suggest that you sit her down and tell her that you
want to make her happy. You have to be serious. Once you do this, she will
tell you what is really going on.

Perhaps she has never had an orgasm in her life? In that case, try a
vibrator. Maybe she can only get off when she is masturbating alone? In this
case, ask her if you can join, or tell her you want to be a part of it. Tell
her it's important to you. Or maybe she has been able to get off with other
men but not with you? Well, it's not your personal technique, it's just how
she feels around you and there is no point in changing yourself to force an
orgasm. Just face the facts that you aren't meant for a sexual relationship
and move on. In conclusion, or all in all.....if a woman is good for you,
she will get off with you or work on getting off with you. That's plain and
simple and very beneficial if you ask me.

Yea sit her down and ask her if she's been able to get off with other men besides you. Then when she says "yes" go stand in front of the mirror and stare at your limp dick while crying.

Or maybe don't ask that question. There are certain questions that should never be asked (next week's column) and this is one of them. What you should be asking her is what she likes and doesn't like about sex. Believe it or not ladies most guys want you to get off during sex. The problem is that we're not very bright and you don't communicate to us what you want in fear that we'll think you're a slut. Am I right or am I right? If we haven't somehow stumbled across getting you off and you finally do tell us it's usually just one suggestion. We need more to work with ladies. We're even less creative then we are bright. Trust me if you can get off more ways then one we wanna hear about or else we're just gonna keep doing the one leg over the other move.

Now this question is coming in from a guy and he has to figure out this information for himself, but ladies if you're reading this please stop worrying about whether you'll look like a slut. We love sluts. We want to be with sluts. The only people that don't like sluts are other sluts. Trust me. I would much rather be with a slut then some chick who can only get off with other dudes. Wait that's a slut!

Topic for the Week: Can a man be a slut? If so what makes him a slut.

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