Straight Up

Dear Jed and Lindsey,

Today I was in the bathroom plucking my eyebrows and I started to wonder if
men even notice my eyebrows? I then started to think about getting a nose
ring and wondered if men like nose rings on women. I guess I am just
curious what you guys think about little facial quirks on men and women. Do
you prefer a woman to have plucked versus natural eyebrows? Do you think
women with facial piercings are sexy? What about if women who wear big earrings?
Do you think its cool for men to wear makeup? What kind of facial style do
you think is hot for both men and women?

--Celeste

After reading your letter I started to wonder if girls really think this way. I guess they do.

The simple answer is that as long as you have two eyebrows there is a guy out there who will date you.

Of course all of this is a matter of opinion but since you asked I'll tell you what I think. First you don't have to try that hard to attract a guy's attention. If all you're looking to do is hook up then go ahead and dress or look however you want. There are lots of guys into piercings and tattoos and earrings or whatever.

I suspect however that you're asking about attracting men for long term relationships. That may be a little tougher because generally we're not really looking for that when we go out. What it basically boils down is thatin the long run most men want a woman who is nice looking in public and wild at home.

Girls you can take home to your parents but that also let you do whatever you want to them is basically what I'm talking about. If your parents happen to still be together you can trust that your mom is super dirty in bed.

As far as eyebrows and piercings and all that, I myself prefer a woman that just takes care of herself. If your eyebrows are bushy then pluck them. Or go to the beauty salon. Whatever it is that girls do to make themselves look pretty then do that and then do it again when it wears off.
If you really need to get a facial piercing because you're this really cool outsider that nobody undertstands then get something small like a stud through your eyebrow or nose. Don't get one of those hog ring septum piecing deals or some giant hoop through your eyeball. They leave gross holes when you take 'em out anyway.

The other thing about guys is we like it when our friends are jealous of us. That's why we like really hot chicks. We'd pretty much fuck anything as long as our friends don't make fun of us for it. If I saw my friend out with some girl and she had a face full of metal then I'm gonna give him a hard time about it.

As for dudes in make up obviously I don't think it's ever a good idea. Again this is my opinion, but it's like .0000025 percent of the male population that can actually pull this off. Guys don't even know how to dress so how are we supposed to apply make up? Unless it's cool Halloween makeup like a gnarly scar or you're a soldier with some sweet camoflauge then I say no to make up. If you like dudes in makeup then you're a lesbian. If you want a straight guy that will stay with you and treat you well, learn how to give a really good blow job.