jwallis's Blog

Once upon a time, there was this girl who had a talent. It was gymnastics and dance. But she wanted to sing, and she was okay, but not great. Then, through the power of technology, she released a hit album, and with surgery to become a D-Cup, she became famous. Then this guy wanted to be famous and be a rapper, so he seduced and impregnated the girl, got famous, and then got his sory butt dumped. NOW another boy has come along and wants to be on her tour because he has no career on his own.

Nick Lache, fresh off his extremely depressing album, has found his tour match. He has been reported as contacting Britney Spears and her party crew to arrange to open for her on her unannounced but theoretically planned comeback tour. He feels his presence could add something to her show and wants to snag a piece of the rebound action.

I'm not sure how I feel about this. I wouldn't call myself a Britney "fan," but she does a killer stage show. Dances, costume changes, minimal singing, she reminds me a lot of old school Janet (Velvet Rope tour anyone?). I'm just trying to wrap my head around what Nick could remotely add to the show. Other than getting more 12 year old girls to show up than before. Which is a blog in itself because it annoys the HELL out of me to listen to 12 year old girls sing "You hurt me so bad/ You broke my heart/ I don't know how I will move on" when most haven't even had their first period, much less heartbreak. That's another story. This is a blog about the rape of Britney's career.

I guess in the end it doesn't matter who opens for Britney, because she's going to have her fans either way. All adding Nick to the lineup does is raise ticket prices about $10. I say go for it, just don't expect much of a demographic to flock because Nick Lache is opening.