Linds's Blog

As I read Jed's column I couldn't help but think of a horribly sad love story that came out years ago. Did anyone else think of Sweet November? You know the movie where Charlize Theron is with Keauna and they are oh so in love until she gets terminal cancer and decides that it would be better for them to not be together while she dies. Something about her not wanting him to see her as she goes through that. Well, I think Jed must have at some point in his life watched this movie and has now written what could be called Sweet November 2. Although in this Sweet November, November would most likely refer to the model of that month on a Playboy calendar. In fact Jed, I think perhaps you should pitch this idea to the Adult Film world. Jenna Jameson would make a great leading lady.

To analyze what this very odd fantasy says about our dear friend who provides us insight into the male mind I think there are three things that are evident.

1. Jed is a creative guy. I mean most guys would say there fantasy is a threesome, but Jed has chosen to create a wonderful Lifetime movie type story in his mind and put a twist of Penthouse into it. Most guys can't pull that one off.
2. Jed understands how women operate. Ok, so this may sound weird to ladies but think about it. How sympathetic are we to men who seem wounded? We love to find "projects" and by that I mean men to use to fix up. Guys that have just been dumped, or have lost someone are a great way to go, because we feel sorry for them. As much as we may hate to admit it, by us making them feel better (and the way you do that is up to you) it makes us feel better. Jed knows this which is straight up ANNOYING. But I also give him props. He's taking the guy with the baby, or puppy thing to the next step.
3. Jed is not getting enough attention, or laid enough these days and needs it desperately. I think it would be safe to say this for the simple fact that he actually wants someone he loves to die so other people feel sorry for him and will sleep with him. Then through this he thinks he will find the right girl. Ok, so call me crazy but I came up with a MUCH better solution. Why not just lie that your last girlfriend died? Ok, ok, so this may sound awful but consider this. You are already forming a relationship based on lies and deception by not telling your future girlfriend about the 100 girls you banged before her. Therefore, an easier lie is to just tell all the random girls you meet in bars that Sally, or Sandy, or whatever name you choose to use, died a horrible death. That way you don't actually have to go through the ordeal of meeting a girl with cancer and watching her die right? I mean if by chance a girl did ask more questions about your make believe dead exgirlfriend you could always say you didn't want to talk about it because it made you sad. Then she'd feel even worse for you and probably sleep with you again. Just a thought.

Overall, I think Jed is maybe, slightly, a hopeless romantic in a very 2000 way. He wants that unforgettable love story, but with a lot of sex. Can we expect anything less from men in the new millennium? I know his story is no Casablanca but it does have the touch of an epic romance to it- if you subtract the whole random sex in bars part. Maybe the middle of his story doesn't matter that much. It does have a sweet beginning and a happily ever after. In 2005 I don't think that's too bad. At least it wasn't the generic "My fantasy is to do two chicks at the same time." So Jed I give Sweet November 2, 4 Stars and Two Thumbs up...as long as it stars Jenna Jameson.