Juji's Blog

Tuesday: Started my day with my regular walk. Felt very pleased with blissful state of inner peace and balance. Had coffee with a stranger I'd met through a classified ad. At an outdoor cafe, the sun glared into my eyes blinding me. He stared into a larger-than-life cleavage of a half-naked woman on a billboard. Traffic flew by blowing my hair so it stuck to my lip gloss. A bird shat on my shoulder and splashed onto my Ray Bans. Karma shattered.

Thursday: Went to the beach for the day. Needed to pee so stopped at a sevice station. Sliding door to the loo was jammed so it only opened about a centimetre. Squeezed my long, metallic blue talons through the gap, curled them around the door and starting yanking at the door with all my might. I'm cursing, huffing and busting. Damm thing won't open. Yanked harder. I'll get this door open if my life depends on it. "There's someone in here", says the toilet. I rush out, the idea of meeting a guy in the washroom, whose privacy I'd just seriously invaded, was worse than death.

Saturday: Went nightclubbing to relieve the tensions of the week. Left my car in Fitzroy Street and went cruising with a seriously neurotic girlfriend who doesn't know how to drive, and takes hour long detours to avoid driving through the city. Many unconscious lane changes later, we return to my car and see something unusual lying behind it. My bumper bar. Of course. What else would it be? I check for witnesses with the greasy terrorist-type behind the counter in the souvlaki bar, who doesn't want to get involved 'cos the culprit is a well-known junkie in the area. Oh good! I throw my bumber in the car and haul my angry tail outta there.

Sunday: Washing machine flooded and soaked the carpet in surrounding rooms. Yanked the carpet up and stuck the fan heater under it. The bloomin' thermostat died and now the thing only blows cold air. Oh well, it'll be good for the summer. Fixed the washing machine. Was feeling very smug about that. Went for a drive and the car broke down. Impatient morons behind me tooted, blind to the fact my hazard lights were flashing. "I'd move if I bloody could", I screamed out the car. My bumberbar-less car got towed and I'm carless today.

I know chanllenges help us grow, but I've done enough growing for one week! Anyone else done some serious 'growing' over the week? Juji x