Dating Down Under...Join Me...Juji x
Well, I hope you guys are all warming up with the new blogs and thoughts on love, life and relationships. Keep those comments coming on in - we love your feedback and opinions and I know you all have something great to contribute. That's what makes life so interesting - behind every single face on the planet is some amazing or fascinating story.
I've been busy consoling a girlfriend whose 4-month relationship just busted up. We've all been through break ups before and we all know it ain't much fun. In fact, waxing your VJ or the hair off your balls is probably more fun. Within four months, my girlfriend had her guy move in, they met the parents, booked the wedding and she was busy designing an oh-so-pretty dress. Talk about a rush. What a head fuck. Don't get me wrong. I'm not putting her down, it's all pretty understandable really. Her experience reminded me of a very valuable lesson - one too easily forgotten when we're in that heady, in-love phase of the first few months of an exciting new relationship. We don't think straight! We're so consumed by our new love, we've got our heads in the distant, fluffy clouds, we're busting with excitement and zest for life, and we hardly eat (who needs it when the sex is so damn good?). We see the world through rose coloured glasses. We're in love with the world and it's in love with us. Yeah, it's a damn good place to be - till you get to really know each other that is.
Not only that, while our body's in the infatuation phase, we're also busy secreting a cocktail of chemicals that are actually happy drugs. These cheery little munchkins with bloody complicated names, like phenylethylamine, dopamine, norepinepherine and oxytocin, swim around our love-struck bodies making us feel high, energetic and extra turned on. With this little love potion bubbling around inside us, it's no wonder some of us decide to have each other's babies before we've really got to know each other. Sure, true love can result and most good relationships started out this way. But remember, when you meet someone who really floats your boat, give it 6 months or more before rushing into things, or it can be one helluva rough storm afterwards. Love to hear your thoughts on the love-struck highs and super hot sex of the first few months of a new relationships. It is, after all, a shitload of fun.
Juji x
I guess bailing before you know whether the person's right or not means you might miss out on a great opportunity for a fab relationship. It's kind of like protecting yourself just in case it turns sour. And if it does, so what? You can still hang onto the great memories of when it was all rosy. Life's full of ups, downs, highs and lows. It ain't one smooth ride. I guess we just have to trust we can ride the lows if and when they come, and know there will be highs again.
When the fun and excitement has worn off, I reckon whether you ditch the relationship depends on whether you love the person or not, despite their annoying habits. If you do, it's time to get your arse into gear and inject some fun and excitement back into it. Forget the mundane, everyday stuff, but get into doing some new things together, discovering more about each other and making it alive and fulfilling. Like anything, you get out of it what you put in.
I do believe it can be sensational and I have had snippets of it here and there that I hold up and aspire towards. Aim for the stars and you may end up with the moon. Now that can't be too bad.
Comment by Juji [Member] — 10/22/05 @ 05:57
Comment by scott [Visitor] — 10/23/05 @ 11:22
I guess there are two choices - be hurt forever and don't ever again open yourself to anyone else - and live a very solitary life. Or, rant, kick and cry a bit, let it go, know you deserve better and move on. I know it's easy to say, and hard to do but not impossible. Maybe it's a bit of a process. There are plenty of good people around.
Comment by Juji [Member] — 10/23/05 @ 18:25
Comment by kzalan [Visitor] — 11/04/05 @ 10:23
Comment by Chris [Visitor] — 04/06/08 @ 13:58